When we discuss certain interactions with people, we categorise the interaction as having “Good Vibes” or “Bad Vibes” and there are some people who are too logical that they do not account for the gut feel or the vibes we get from people and they would wish for some logical evidence that the person is indeed good or bad.
However, when the evidence that the person is bad is already there, it is often already too late to avoid them or damage has already been done. It has to be said though that negative people would have good vibes with people who are likewise as negative as they are so this would have to be considered.
People with like vibrations often attract each other and become fast friends. Criminals and sociopaths often hang out with each other and enjoy each others company and let this be your guide that “Birds of the same feather are often the same birds.” Try to let go of your saviour complex and delusion that you would be able to save or reform such a person.
People who eventually harm us are able to do so because they present themselves in a manner which allows us to let down our guard. So the comment, “But he/she seems like a nice person.” is not valid in such cases. Predators are great with conserving their energy for the kill so if they are able to disarm the prey who willingly submits to them, all the better.
These people who eventually harm us irreparably often present themselves in such a benign manner that when they start turning up the toxicity, we often wonder whether we are imagining it. If they presented themselves in a manner which clearly outlines them as negative people capable of harming us, we would not even have let them in close enough to do any damage.
Even if the person presents themselves in such a charming, likeable, and harmless manner, we must consider our gut feel whether we get “Good Vibes” or “Bad Vibes” from them. If we feel uncomfortable for whatever reason, we must not proceed with abandon because we might end up regretting it. We often allow our five senses to deceive our better judgement.
It’s time to be more vigilant and make better emotional choices since the consequences of faulty emotional choices can be deadly.
(c) Niconica 2014
When people start to give an alibi to justify whatever they have done or are about to do which pertains to not keeping agreements or abuses boundaries, I don’t bother to listen to the verbal garbage. An alibi is a lie and it’s not worth listening to or discussing.
When people wish to do something, they find a way. When they do not wish to do it, they find an excuse. It’s just that simple. Sometimes we get lost in the complexities but if we go down the the bare bones, it either is or isn’t.
Trust is about keeping agreements and every time the agreement is not kept for whatever reason, it erodes the trust whether or not there was a good reason for it. Basic respect for fellow human beings is the minimum for human interaction.
Review all your relationships and friendships and be stringent with the quality of interaction. When people do not respect us, they act in ways which make it evident. Even if the words are laced with sweetness, we will be able to feel that something is not quite right.
And when this is so, it is time to give serious thought about whether we wish to entertain and accept such toxicity in our lives and interactions. Do we wish to prolong something which is emotionally and psychologically unhealthy?
If we choose to prolong it because we wish to be passive and let things play out, we are taking an active hand in our own destruction and we should not be surprised it we start manifesting strange maladies and diseases. It’s like drinking poison and wondering why we are getting sick.
Let’s keep our mental, emotional, and psychological diet healthy and clean so that we would be able to better ourselves as human beings instead of always just surviving or learning how to firefight the latest emotional rubbish handed to us to disturb our equilibrium.
(c) Niconica 2014
As humans we have a basic need to be validated and feel that we matter and that we are important to the people who matter to us. When we are cheated on by someone whom we love a lot, we are invalidated as a person and it destroys us and weakens us on many levels… When it happens often enough, the result is disease.
It is often that the spouse or partner who has been cheated on repeatedly internalises the pain develops a disease because the psychological poison has to have a way to manifest. Sometimes we focus on the actual terminal disease and the external cures which are supposed to help without changing the patterns in our lives which caused the circumstance in the first place.
A constant current of negative emotion poisons our energy systems and it eventually becomes toxic to our physical body. If the resentment or the anger or pain isn’t expressed or let out, it accumulates and physical disease manifests.
Invalidating is defined as weakening or destroying and this is what we do when we are not able to respect the bonds of commitment and we are not able to respect the partner enough to be faithful. Every single act of infidelity invalidates the other person and when it gets to the critical point, it literally and figuratively destroys the other.
Be mindful of your thoughts, actions, and words. They affect people on more than one level… if not all.
(c) Niconica 2014