Fortunately or unfortunately, we inherit more than a penchant for certain genetic illnesses from our forebears, we might also inherit negative viewpoints and tendencies–such as fear, hatred, anger, or a tendency for passive aggression. It would be a fair assumption that unless we are in the throes of serious depression that we are aiming to improve our lives in one way or the other and before we look at external factors or even other people, we must examine ourselves and the family culture we grew up with.

Even if we have isolated or distanced ourselves from our clan for one reason or another and are luckily free of their direct or immediate influence, we must observe our thoughts and tendencies to see whether we have inherited the legacy of fear which has been transmitted to us in our childhood and which we may have accepted as a natural part of our worldview–and we might not even be consciously aware of this influence upon us, unless we are looking for it.

In an ideal world, our parents and older relatives would be paragons of virtue who only want the best for us and wish us well–they would encourage us to be balanced individuals and believe in ourselves and nurture our talents.  However, aside from a few select fortunate people, this is not the case.  Chances are, our parents and relatives are just but humans with selfish tendencies and weaknesses–far from perfect, and they may consciously or unconsciously transmit their fears, doubts, and anxieties to us whether they like it or not.

We then grow up doubting ourselves and our talents and become corrupted by negative tendencies and plagued by unhappiness. Many of us have grown up in unhealthy emotional environments, and after a period of rebellion, anger, hate, fear, and doubt, we must eventually get over these futile emotions and not use our past as an excuse to wallow in self-pity and spread the legacy of fear to others.

At one point or another, we have experienced attacks on our self-esteem and experienced self-doubt, and it is healthy to the extent that we are not overcome by arrogance but it must be the jumping off point for bigger and better things–striving to overcome ourselves.  We must acknowledge that there are many unhappy and fearful people around us and they may be unconsciously, maliciously, or misguidedly be causing us to doubt ourselves and fear many things because they do not know any better–and because misery does love company.

Upon acknowledging this fact, we must decide whether we will allow ourselves to be bound by their beliefs and their limitations or whether we will strive to improve ourselves and move forward.  What has occurred in the past need not be a reflection or prediction of the future if we do not allow it to be. We must not feed the fear ‘monster’ anymore so that we can be free from it.  We may choose to not let our parents or forebears realities to be our own and we may choose to not let their opinions come into fruition.  We can prove them wrong–when they are being negative.

We can walk into the light, into hope–one step at a time and shake off the fear virus transmitted to us by our upbringing and eventually develop an immune system to conquer or withstand it.  We have the power within us to develop a fear ‘vaccine’ which inoculates us from the disastrous effect of family-transmitted fear and negativity.  Begin now.

(c) Niconica 2013

 

Advertisements