They say timing is everything and I would say it’s not literally everything but it is an undeniably important factor when it comes to romance and seeing a romantic connection’s fruition into something more meaningful than mutual attraction.

It need not be said that one-sided attractions would not fall into this category because a romantic connection requires two parties participating in it on their own volition. Yet even at this stage, it may or may not make it to the next stage simply because of timing issues.

A significant age gap between the two individuals involved will fall under tricky timing simply because of the age difference but it would be more because of the relevant discrepancy between their life stages. Yet life stage discrepancies don’t only apply to people with an age gap, it could simply be that they are not in the same frame of mind where they can allow for the attraction to grow because this requires time and attention and when one’s attention is drawn to something else be it a personal or a career-related or even another romantic loose end then one cannot invest the requisite focus to respond and encourage the other.

It then happens that the person who has been making all the effort will be dissuaded and after a period of time it would be the previously pursued who would make the effort and sometimes to no avail, depending on where the other person is at emotionally. After being rejected or perceiving rejection, it would not be so easy for the previously eager party to resume the initial eager advances because they have been hurt by the non-response or the ambiguous or even outright distancing behaviour of the object of their affections.

They would eventually cease their efforts, lick their wounds, and get on with their lives. And if it were a real rejection from the person they desired, the story would end there. However, sometimes, it’s not the case because sometimes, life isn’t that simple.

It may only be that their advances have come during an inopportune moment when the person they fancy is in a strange mind space or too preoccupied with other pressing life events to really process what was going on. It may be that during another time, when the situation allowed for it, the interaction may have gone a more encouraging and favorable way had it not been for the obstacles and the timing.

It takes a lot of luck (and maybe even fate) to get the timing right. It would be good if the people who are fortunate enough to have the right timing to appreciate what they have because sometimes, it’s not for a lack of wanting, but there just happened to be other things going on at the time which prevented the furthering of a romantic connection because timing can be trickier than we might suppose.

(c) Niconica 2013

Advertisements